Rocks Seen From the Edges of Cliffs

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Last night I dreamt my body was in revolt again
That I had never learnt to be afraid of spiders
And they were attacking me again. That the fear
Of hissing noises and hanging from cliffs
Had never rewired my brain and now I was
Falling, reaching for slithering vines with
Venom in their teeth. And I think how billions
Of deaths have not taught us what to do
With grief. So many, I had not thought death
Had not taught us so many truths and ways to
Go on living. No phobias, no thicker skins,
No recoil from the hiss and bite of grief. How has
Evolution passed us by, I think. Maybe, as usual,
I have the wrong end of this writhing mess. Maybe
It is grief that keeps us human in the face
Of so much ugliness.

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Remembrance

Is sometimes the rushing
Of a green river, carving
Stone pillars in the crumbling canyons
Of my Heart. Driven apart.
The riven highlands offer the years
A pebble at a time. A rock here
And there standing when
All about broke into dust eons
Ago. Today is a bridge under
Which the rushing waters sound
The deep, a thing to stand on
When all else seems tumbling
Past. To not have to leap. This
Bridge will not be
The last.

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Fly Me To The Moon

I don’t want directions. Signs
And arrows, instructions, and
Soon, who knows, a checklist
Of do’s, don’ts, definitely nots. Just
Give me wings, don’t make me
Flap my arms and tell me I must
Flap faster if I want this to
Work. And that wind beneath
My wings, for the love of god,
Don’t make me search a
Lifetime don’t make me crawl
Under every stone, fall
Into every ravine, creep
Into every crevice, sleep
Away a lifetime just so I
Can keep dreaming. Beaming
Moonshine at me isn’t hard
To do. If you really want something to
Point me to, turn my face so
I can see the turning blue planet
I was meant to be. Each ocean
And mountain clear to my eye
Every leaf and stone exposed to my
Moon-standing self. I’ll fold
My wings, blow out the wind,
If once I could see everything
I am and was meant to be.

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Courage IV

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I want to be the rain
That is driven up shields of glass
Against all laws of nature and grief
I want to know that as
I fall from skies shedding legions
Of such as me, over loaded over crowded
Bent on hurtling earthwards, that I
Will rise again, pushed onwards
On wings of air, knowing when
And where, the edge of glass meets
The skies. Not this me
Strapped and seated
Watching the road fly past through
Streaks of water. Strapped
And seated, not
Undefeated.

The sea, like grey silk

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The sea like grey silk
Clothes its depths in
Shimmering sadness. And
Grief is not a cliff that
Demands that you leap, but
Every shipwreck knows that
There is a limit to
How long it can keep its
Secrets in the deep before
The sea strips all veneer, and
They rise, cliff like, to crash
On unclothed shores.